Zombie Survival   After action report…

Camp Miles…

December 29 2007.

The first order of business was to inform everyone that General Scott Olding, the defending Camp Miles Champion would not be attending due to the death of his father in law, instead Kevin Harbinger from the Miami TrailGunners would be heading the British Red team.

Kevin was warned that he'd be facing serious competition against Bloody Bill Bones leading the American CIA Blue Team. Bones is a true Limited Paint General and has a long successful track record of leading his teams to victory. Bones is known for using the strengths of his players wisely and for finding loopholes in the game scenario to maximize his points and stymie his enemies scoring possibilities.

Game Briefing began at 10:30 AM. The British and American teams were approximately equal in numbers, while the Zombie team started with just 5 players. Teams would earn points by accomplishing mission objectives, while Zombies were interested only in increasing the size of the Zombie Horde. Zombies convert players to Zombies by barrel tapping any player prior to the player getting his barrel condom on. Further, Zombies as we all know, can only be killed by headshot.

The first mission put the British and Americans in a Race to be the team that could successfully repair a damaged oil pipeline deep in the jungle. Each team was issued Five couplings in their team colors that would be used to reconnect the damaged lengths of pipe. This would be a timed game in which the team would receive 1 point per repair made. Also at large was a group of Zombies which were last seen in the open fields just beyond the pipeline. Zombies would start with 5 points (for volunteering) and get one point per Zombie created.

The first game found both teams moving slowly, familiarizing themselves to the pristine forest environment, this allowed the Zombies to take strong positions in the choke points near the pipeline. The Zombies successfully prevented either team from even touching the pipe. Both teams learned how difficult it was going to be to kill zombies, neither British or American teams would score these scenario points but an alternative objective would be provided throughout all 6 games. Red team would score first and most often on this rec-ball style prop, that being what we call a wheel on a tree, half red half blue, players would gain three points should their color be up at the end of the game.

Game two.

The British and American General decided to make a brief truce and attempt a total Zombie elimination. Judges and Zombies were surprised and confused to see intermixed British and American Troops conduct a perfect pincher movement. Zombies could only be killed by headshot and many rounds were striking necks and hands, some zombies seemed to welcome the headshot when it finally came. The zombies were quickly eliminated. The length of the truce was based on time and an uneasy quiet soon developed. Red and blue players started separating, fingers hovered over triggers while all waited for a cue or an order to fire. During this confused and uncertain time, Bones slipped over to the pipeline and completed the repairs taking all the points. When the game clock reached 5 minutes chaos erupted as both teams emptied their paintball guns at each other in total elimination mode at close range.

Games 3

At this point in the battle the British and American Teams were both concerned with a local election. With their pipeline repaired, the Locals were deciding by vote whether to sell their Oil in US dollars or in British Pounds Sterling. Near the end of the voting day Zombies had entered the village and the Villagers had fled. With the UN arriving soon to collect the votes both the CIA and British MI5 had decided to replace the existing ballot boxes with nearly identical boxes so as to ensure their country the uninterrupted flow of oil.

In game 3 the zombies concealed themselves very near the front of the field intending to zombie bite unsuspecting players as they left the field without their barrel condoms on. Unfortunately the Zombies were spotted early and heavily outnumbered. The Zombies were pressed against the safety net and quickly eliminated after creating only 2 new Zombies. The British successfully swapped out the ballot boxes with their own and the UN representatives led by Jimmy Carter, never new the difference.

Game 4

The Teams switched starting positions on the field and again attempted to Change the ballots. This time the Zombies now seven in number placed themselves in deep cover to the rear of the teams bases. The zombies waited silently as again the American team successfully replaced the ballot boxes, unfortunately, this time American backfield players were decimated by Zombies. The British suffered fewer zombie conversions and captured the wheel points again. The Americans  were finding themselves close in points and in need of a knock out score. Total point possibilities were now increasing and the Americans were going to really need to play strong but with more zombies to harass any operation, missions were sure to become much more difficult. NOTE: a squad of tough to kill Zombies has been documented to be a threat to an entire platoon of human special forces.  Zombie Survial Guide by Max Brooks 

In Games 5 & 6 The British and Americans were assigned the task of collecting the dead zombies from the field and taking them to a mass grave near their base for a funeral pyre. It was at the request of the local chieftain that the bodies of ten babies left near the central town of little bunkerville be retrieved from the field as soon as possible. These corpses would be easily identifiable as they were in bloated 30 gallon body bags. It would be advantageous for the country that could best perform this delicate task earning much favor when it came time to take the oil. Teams would be awarded 2 points per body retrieved, as long as the bodies were in their teams mass grave and set afire prior to the end of the game. Pre-game questions indicated that body stealing by the opposing team was sure to be an important part of the game. It was decided that you could not steal a burning body, this ignition would occur when a general felt his corpse total threatened he then could toss his can of gas into his pit. A lot of points were available and the Zombies were going to need a lot of conversions in order to be in the points race for the trophy, that’s when it was revealed that the Zombies general Mike Crawford would be holding a single carton of magic potion that once tossed into either teams mass grave would immediately end the game and re-animate those dead babies adding points to the Zombie score.

Game 5

In the 5th Game after a late Zombie charge Mike managed to infiltrate to the American Funeral Pyre and Stop the game by diving in. However, a paint check revealed a mask hit, and he was eliminated and the Zombies were denied the points. The strength displayed by the increasing Zombie ranks would now force Bones to focus more on defense. Blue team would score secondary wheel points along with several bodies. The score separation would now require a lucky break if red players were going to shoot for the trophy. Zombies managed to convert only a couple of little kids a new girl and a guy who couldn’t speak English, but points just the same.

Game 6

Pre-game questions from Bones of the American blue team seemed to be about preventing the red team from stealing back the bodies, and therefore the points during the game. Unknown to Bones was that the British (red team) led by Harbinger had entered into a desperate and unholy alliance with the Zombie Leader Mike Crawford.

As the last game started both of the living teams were informed that the nation they were trying to influence was near collapse due to the increasing Zombie infestation. The last known dead babies to be found would be closer laying in the open on a centrally located road. Information about the roving undead whereabouts was provided just before the start of this last game, fortunately these Zombies last known location was over 200 yards away in an open field feeding on their own dead

From the starting horn the Americans were swift capturing seven bodies before being driven off by a two front attack, British to the south, Zombies to the west. As the pressure continued to build against Bones' west flank he shifted players to the north to counter this dangerous Zombie charge. Over the next few tense moments Bones decided to move six of his seven bodies into the safety reentry area, a section of the play field that cannot be entered by anyone other than that team. This action may have first been planned by Bones to remove these points from the game completely as his blue team was ten points ahead. The Zombie charge subsided sooner than Bones expected, so the ever cautious blue team leader decided to settle into a strong defense around their safe reentry area.

A few minutes later much shouting and arguing erupted on the southern front within the Red teams ranks as the unholy alliance began to strain, many zombies were needlessly wounded from very close range. Harbinger managed to get his troops under control and working with the zombies urged his British troops to move forward. It was an uneasy alliance though, as both the Zombie leader and the British team Leader shuffled their troops around in an attempt to make sure they would be in a superior tactical position should the truce falter. At the same time many zombies were quietly converting a large number of the British troops with barrel taps. When the Zombie leader Mike Crawford got a little too close to red teams Funeral Pyre which now contained three gas covered dead babies, Harbinger ordered his troops to fire on the Zombies but it was too late, many of his troops had already been silently converted and now just wondered around Zombie-like stunned at the double cross.

Across the battlefield, Bones decided that with the game near its timed finish, he would casually move his six retrieved bodies into his mass grave and win on points total. His plan would be just seconds too late. Because back on the southern front Harbinger and his remaining British troops dropped to one knee and blasted away at pointblank range at the masks of the Zombies, but headshots would be hard to come by in the confusion of the double-cross. Bones recognizing  the double-cross unfolding in the distance began ordering his troops to quickly move the bodies to his pyre. Mike, sporting hits from shoulder to toe, tightened his grip on the box of magic potion and in a superman like move, dove into red teams mass grave ending the game early!  The zombies had won the day!


Legend has it that every Zombie Game ever tried worldwide has ended with a Zombie victory. The legend continues! Mike Crawford’s Zombies edged out Bloody Bill Bones blue team by just a single point. Kevin’s Red Team brought up the rear after being double-crossed by a bunch of Zombies…

P.S. I have played paintball from the time the paint was oil based, I have played many styles of play at many different fields. I know that after a field operators best laid plans are set, having a game play out like this one would require a healthy measure of luck! Thank you all who attended this fantastic paintball game at camp miles Florida USA, I hope many more players will attend our next event March 14 15 16 ----2008

Yours Truly

 Keith Woerner

Camp Miles Paintball